Dug up from the for the particular contest based around it.

The Emperor's Decree
is a mysterious book, discovered by the Ministry of Niceties during the terrible Dismembre snowstorm of 1726. The original copy was badly damaged, and no publishing date could be discerned, but it was remarkably intact and provided ample entertainment for the Minister and his secretary while they were trapped in Ministry building during the course of the storm. It is speculated to have been published between 1379 and 1385, perhaps as a bid to cash in on the mania caused by Day Arndt Pritchard's "Walkin' With Mah Paws In Lands Wiffout Laws, And Then Also In Some With."


The plot follows the trials and tribulations of a group of adventurous vermin as they explore the Mahsterious Sahthern Cahntinent, set out by the Emperor in reaction to Pritchard's novel. Authored as if from several perspectives, each of the characters gives a personal account with each chapter of the tale, providing different perspectives and making the story remarkably complex for its proposed time of printing. As the story progresses, the group encounters pirates, mutineers, warring native tribes of lizards and wildcats, giant beast-eating snakes, and a group of evil sociologists. Members of the party were killed off one-by-one, usually in the most gratuitous and violent ways possible, until only three of the once-large party survive. Copious amounts of dark material are spread through the pages - blood, gore, murder, wanton violence, angst, dark secrets and betrayal - making it a very good read indeed.

For those interested in reading, the Ministry of Niceties has begun distributing new printings of the book, and one can find it at most major booksellers in the Imperium.

(It can be read just as easily at

Theories And SpeculationEdit

Though thought to be more fiction than anything else, The Emperor's Decree does seem to belay this by revealing some eerily accurate connections to important historical events and discoveries in the Imperium. Historians and laybeasts alike have begun debating whether the book is a factual account or merely a gigantic coincidence.

The Alton Bay ConnectionEdit

This is one of the more popular and rather unshakable pieces of evidence supporting the book's standing as a true story. According to this theory, the explorers in the tale spent many of their adventures on the Mahsterious Sahthern Cahntinent in and around what is today Alton Bay. This is supported by many factors. Near the settlement stands a site of crumbling, ancient stone ruins, whose visible architecture and layout have been matched with the tribal lizard village. There have also been sightings of the mysterious wandering cats in the area - a potential link to the book's Atskiya tribe of warrior felines.

Perhaps the strongest supporting evidence goes to the founding of the Bay itself. Though initially rediscovered by the weasel Cornelius Alton, the Bay did not have a proper settlement returned to it until the recolonization effort led by his son, Captain Fletcher Alton, and his wife. Though historical documents and recovered logs have thus far not revealed the name of Mrs. Alton, it is widely believed that she was one of the surviving explorers from the novel. Captain Alton is mentioned in the story as forming a budding romance with this character, and both the book and historical documents mention that, before their marriage, Mrs. Alton had been an instructor of proper etiquette.

The Red Herring ConnectionEdit

No, this isn't an analogy to something misleading. It of course refers to The Red Herring of Bully Harbour. The book, in its epilogue, seems to reveal the origin of the Red Herring and its early years. This proves to go along perfectly with records of the establishment's early years. It also mentions the Dimblebys, the family that to this day owns the property. The book proclaims that Mr. and Mrs. Dimbleby were also survivors of the ill-fated expedition, and reaped a substantial financial reward from their endeavors. This might explain the mysterious sum of money the pair had when they seemed to come out of nowhere and purchased the shop that would later become the Red Herring.